German Couples Turn to AI Chatbots for Relationship Guidance

A Pronova BKK study released in March found that 39 % of Germans have already asked AI chatbots such as ChatGPT or Gemini for advice on partnership issues, with 44 % of men and 33 % of women believing they can speak more openly to a bot than to their own partner.

In Stuttgart, a 41‑year‑old woman named Isabell consulted ChatGPT after suspecting her husband of infidelity. She told the AI, “I asked the AI because it was a bit embarrassing to talk to a real person,” and used its suggestions to formulate conversation starters and explore whether she should consider an affair herself. The bot replied, “The more important question is whether an affair would really help you achieve what you want.”

Researchers such as Dana Mahr of the Karlsruhe Institute of Technology note that AI provides a low‑threshold, always‑available space for reflection, saying, “It does not get hurt, does not shame, and can be very patient.” However, psychologists warn of downsides: Bastian Schiller of Heidelberg University cautioned that the AI’s tendency to be flattering can reinforce existing views, stating, “The view I already have gets even more confirmed.” Experts agree that while AI can aid in wording difficult messages, it cannot replace human counselling or therapy.

Overall, the growing use of AI for intimate advice highlights both its practical appeal and the ethical concerns surrounding reliance on automated guidance in personal relationships.