Psychologist explains meaning of 'not my type' dating phrase

Psychologist Markus Ernst provides insight into the ambiguous dating phrase, ‘Actually, you are not my type.’ According to Ernst, a couple therapist and expert associated with Parship’s ‘Dating Compass 2026,’ the meaning of the statement depends heavily on context.

While the phrase can be perceived as an insult, it can also serve as a compliment. Ernst suggests that for individuals stuck in repetitive or unsuccessful dating patterns, breaking away from a specific ‘type’ can be a positive sign. In such cases, the statement may indicate that the person is realizing their previous ideas of a ‘perfect match’ were limited and that they are finding genuine interest in someone unexpected.